Dear Anonymous Teacher

 Dear Anonymous Teacher,

A few weeks ago I had you fill out a survey for me for a PD that I was going to. It was about my leadership style and it asked you about the things I do well and the things that I need to improve on. 45 people completed the survey and I received the results earlier this week. I got a lot of good feedback for my personal growth and it was great reading some of the comments at the end. Those comments do more than the numerical ratings because it lets you hear the thoughts of the people that I work with. The comments taught me that I might be more of a "people person" than I thought and that communication is really important to the people that work here. I learned that I could improve on being more direct with some people and that I don't always seem consistent. But your comment caught my attention the most. It said, "Even though it sometimes feels as though I was a "better than an empty classroom" hire, I am thankful for the opportunities and training provided by working at GCHS." Reading it made me pause the first time and I've come back to it several times since. 

The survey was anonymous and that gave everyone permission to say things that they mean. But it also means that I can't find you to tell you that you're more than a "better than an empty classroom" hire. I don't need to know who you are to tell you that. I know this because you're still here. You show up to do the job of trying to educate and lead children. You mentioned being thankful for training and opportunity. That shows that you're taking it seriously and are conscious about trying to be better. I can't tell you how much I appreciate that. Unfortunately, one of the side effects of working in an organization is that we often compare ourselves to others around us. We see others with more experience or even just someone in a good moment and feel like we aren't enough. We also see others in a time of struggle and wonder why they can't get it together. It's human nature and I'm probably never going to be good enough to change that about the people in any organization. But I can tell you that you matter to this organization. You show up for kids and those kids (even though they stress us out) are always our top priority. 

Over a decade of leading schools has taught me that it's much more difficult today to find teachers than it was when I started. I used to ask all kinds of pedagogy questions in interviews and now I look for people that care. We can teach you how to teach if you're willing to learn. That's you. And it's everyone else that reads this and wonders if they matter or if they are doing well enough at this crazy thing we call education. So do me a favor and throw that phrase out of your mind. No matter who you are, I promise you're good enough.

How Are You Doing?

I had just gotten home from fishing during the Thanksgiving break when I got the call from the Sheriff's Department. My schedule this year hasn't allowed much time to be on my boat and just getting back there was great. I expected the call to be about an ongoing situation with another student. Looking back, I certainly wish it had been. On Sunday, the YoungLife group asked if they could use the gym to meet and celebrate his life and give kids some space to work out what they were feeling. I expected twenty or so kids to be there, but so many more showed up. That night probably helped us so much more on Monday morning, but Monday wasn't exactly easy either. Since Sunday night we have hugged a lot of kids. I've hugged kids that, in the past, I've fussed at as well as anyone for things they have done wrong. 

If you work in schools long enough, I guess it is inevitable that this will happen from time to time, but it never gets easier. But what has changed, is the response from the school community at large. Other schools know what we are going through. Most have probably been there before and they want to show empathy for our loss. Between flowers, offerings to financially support the family, and outward displays of support for the school, their empathy for our situation has been so helpful and I truly believe it is a powerful lesson that we are teaching kids. Empathy says, "I don't feel what you feel, but I can understand that it must be difficult, and I'm sorry." They will use that a lot more in life than some of the other content we teach.

When others have asked me this week, "How are you doing?" My inclination is to talk about my students and staff. "It's been a tough week but, we are getting better," I say. But a colleague this week followed that and said, "I asked how you are doing." It was probably the first time I had stopped to process things myself. Like many of you, I'm tired and I hurt when I see kids hurt. My job is to take care of them and you. Your job is to take care of them and each other. In times of difficulty, we don't always stop to take a record of how we are doing. I gained a new appreciation for those that check on us personally this week and it's something that we all need to do far more often. Even in times that are not in crisis. So my message this week is this: Check in on the people that you care about, especially those that you know don't do a great job of looking after themselves. It always matters.